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#1 What The Bleep Do I Know?

Introduction to blog series addressing Homosexuality & Christianity : If you want to know more about homosexuality, you can buy a book about it. There are plenty out there. I know. I used to sell them! So, this series isn’t going to be a regurgitation of information found in books. These are real conversations that will not be predictable.

Although this is still a “baby blog,” I have been blessed with such brilliant commenters (I’m not beyond flattery – It’s a southern thang!) that I’m eager to have these conversations with you! I believe that when folks like you share things you are challenged by in your sphere of influence, the ripple effects can rock the world… much more so than starting a ministry or getting involved politically (though those things have their place).

So, why should you be interested in this? This topic may not hit close to home with you. But I assert that although we’ll talk about things specific to homosexuality, it’s not really the issue. That’s the great illusion. Engaging in conversations about complex issues tends to surface our core spiritual values. It may be a shocking look in the mirror revealing hidden pride & prejudice. Or it could deepen convictions that were seeds planted long ago in need of watering. Ultimately it renews our minds and continues to transform us more into the image of Jesus Christ. And who couldn’t stand more of that?

Personally, I believe this is a defining issue in Christianity today… the church’s Achilles’ heel. In spite of all our strengths impacting the world for Christ, our reaction and response to people who deal with homosexual feelings could be our fatal weakness in our witness to the world.

The majority of my blog commenters are Christians, so I’ll speak to that audience, but anyone is welcome to join in…

So… what do I know? Why should you care what I think about homosexuality anyway? I am not gay. I don’t wield a degree in psychology as my authority. I am not an accredited counselor who specializes in gender identity disorders or sexual orientation.

But for 15 years I have been tutored by relationships that far supercede anything I’ve read in a book. So homosexuality is more than just a word to me… it’s the faces of people I have loved and who have generously loved me better than I deserve.

They are men and women who are gay as well as men and women who have same-sex attractions that they choose not to act on because of their faith convictions. They are single, married to the opposite sex, in a committed gay relationship, celibate, promiscuous... They are Christian, atheist, searching, ambivalent… They are parents, grandparents, adolescents… They are college students, factory workers and adults who have jobs in education, medicine, law, banking, engineering, religion, music…

They are men and women just like you and me.  They are confident, fearful, fulfilled, yearning, popular, outcasts… humans, created in the image of God.  And one category doesn't fit all.

I cannot presume to speak for them, yet their voices have been silenced to a large degree in the Christian community. They deserve to be heard, so I endeavor to speak of their lives with deep love and respect.

If you’re reading this, you are invited to join in these conversations. No need to RSVP. Just show up when you can and make yourself comfortable here. I'm putting on a pot of coffee on this chilly autumn afternoon, and I lift a toast to you!  Wherever you may be on the issue of homosexuality, your story matters.  Diverse opinions are not only expected, they are welcome!

So, y'all come back now, ye hear?!

(The plan is to post 2-3 chunks a week - depending on resulting dialogue.  Lord willing, we can get through it all before Thanksgiving!  I'm looking forward to our time together!)

Posted on Sunday, October 15, 2006 at 03:35PM by Registered CommenterAngie | Comments41 Comments

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Reader Comments (41)

Angie...sweet friend...I am so curious about this discussion. I am all ears and open.

By the way...I've been listening to the music you sent me, and, I love it all!!! I love that you put so much on there that you thought I'd like and it just makes me feel so special that you took the time. It may seem like a small thing to you, but it isn't. You have always (as long as I've known you) been so thoughtful...this is one of the many gifts God has given you. Thank you for using your gifts for his Glory...you are a blessing to SO many.

Wishing I could be drinking that coffee with you....love you dearly...flee
Oct 15, 2006 at 04:44PM | Unregistered CommenterFelicia
sounds great! i'm in!
would you like some gay traffic directed your way? ;) i'm not kidding...you know i've been referred to as the Christian equivalent of Cher to "the gays"! haha! I'd love to write about it and link to it....if you want...just give me the okay and it will be my next post. Email me.

love you!
pam
Oct 15, 2006 at 07:51PM | Unregistered Commenterpam
I, too, am very curious to hear what you say. I do not know a lot about this topic, but I am anxious to learn more because I have long suspected (as you hint in your writing) that the church has often been guility of making some sins more "severe" than others. My prayer is that no one who wants to know God will be isolated because of their sin or struggle. Looking forward to your writing!
Oct 15, 2006 at 08:40PM | Unregistered Commentercrittermer
FLEE, my cup of coffee would've tasted much better in your company! I'm glad you're into the tunes I sent. This week I'm hooked on India Arie's cover of "The Heart of the Matter" and "There's Hope." Check them out. Sure do appreciate your kind words - made me blush a little. Thanks for being so easy to love!

CHER! (aka Grace, aka Pam...) Girl, I'm so glad "I got you, babe!" I'd be honored if you mentioned this conversation on your blog... Everyone's welcome, even "Gypsys, tramps and thieves!" BTW, you are constantly in my prayers. If it's any consolation, "we all sleep alone!" I love you, sweet Pam!!!

Yay, CRITTER's on board! Honored to have you. I haven't known you for very long, but you are already a perspective I value. And what a beautiful prayer... that no one who wants to know God would be isolated. I'm gonna steal those words!
Oct 15, 2006 at 09:37PM | Unregistered CommenterAngie
I'm looking forward to learning more about this. Your blog is certainly a place that I value in terms of valid information. I know how much you love and respect God's children, and from what I can tell, everyone who comments here loves you as well! It should be a very loving exchange of information about same sex attraction that gives me an opportunity to examine my own thoughts and feelings. I don't want to be judgmental or guilty of prejudice. I may not comment often, but rest assured I will be reading with an open mind and heart!
Oct 15, 2006 at 10:36PM | Unregistered CommenterNell
Oh! And can we have flavored coffee during the discussions? My favorite is amaretto!
Oct 15, 2006 at 10:37PM | Unregistered CommenterNell
Thanks for the emails chica. I look forward to the exchange. I'll be lovin to leave my rants.

My one quick comment for now is that none of us live up to God's ideal for our lives. While God calls us to a higher standard of living (to His ideal), He's also realistic in that we won't make it. If God didn't have this realistic attitude, then why did He send us Christ? He would have made salvation performance based. We all come to God as an imperfect, miserable lot in need of a Savior that comes down to where we are to carry us up to God.

Lovin' you guys.

J
Oct 15, 2006 at 11:03PM | Unregistered CommenterJason Harris
BTW - I forgot...

I (Jason) want a triple grande soy vanilla with whip latte... It's my Yuppie Cuppie and I'm proud.

I (Michelle) want a grande soy maple machiato...

J & M
Oct 15, 2006 at 11:17PM | Unregistered CommenterJason Harris
NELL - the one and only! I couldn't ask for a better spirit in which to discuss the hard stuff - an open mind and heart. One amaretto, coming right up! Enjoy! (and thanks for that encouraging e-mail you sent - words from God!)

JASON... are you holding a paintbrush, because that comment was such a beautiful picture of the grace and freedom of Christianity... (sorry, that was eloquent in my mind, but reads like cheese - almost sounded like a Christian version of a pick-up line... You know the ones..."Are your legs tired? Because you've been running through my mind all day?) Aaaaaanyway.....

OK, let's see J & M... that's a triple grande soy vanilla and a grande soy... Oh, forget it. Two black coffees, comin' up! I'm sure I blew the tip on that one!

Those California people! :-)

Oct 16, 2006 at 12:20AM | Unregistered CommenterAngie
I can smell the coffee, Angie!
I admire you so much, sis, for your willingness to embark on this journey.
I'm also in stitches over your reply to Cher/Grace/Pam above. You are brilliant, you know?
Grace and peace to you, my friend,
-bill
Oct 16, 2006 at 12:38AM | Unregistered CommenterBill
I've got my coffee with Hazelnut cream & an open heart - I'm in!
Oct 16, 2006 at 09:20AM | Unregistered Commenterbeaner
I know this is a "close to your heart" subject and I am looking forward to your thoughts.
Oct 16, 2006 at 10:13AM | Unregistered CommenterLee Hodges
Angie
What perfect timing you have. I was just weeping over this topic this morning. Furtunately, my kids are young. They have rarely seen me cry, so they thought it was funny. Cooper(3) and Noelle(1) kept laughing and trying to grab the tears on my face. Needless to say I could not cry long. One because it was really cute and Two because they were starting to hurt my face trying to grab/slap my tears. Why was I crying you ask? Well I have a brother that is amazing and says he loves God, and has been in a monogamous commited same sex relationship for almost 8 years. I have more questions now than ever. It would be easier if it were just me, but I have 3 young kids. I feel my heart is being torn. In your wisdom, Angie, you said "One category doesn't fit all." Everyone is a different situation. I believe some are more accountable than others. I believe we should all take to heart what Peter writes. We should "make every effort to add to our faith goodness; and to goodness,knowledge;and to knowledge, self-control; and to self-control, perseverance; and to perseverance, godliness; and to godliness, brotherly kindness; and to brotherly kindness, love." I am looking forward to your future blogs and I am going to go make myself a coffee. Angie, thank you for being one brave enough to open the topic.
Oct 16, 2006 at 10:18AM | Unregistered CommenterAmg G
Late to the party...but I just want plain old coffee...black if you will, why mess up a good thing!

Angie, I have great respect for you and for tackling this subject. I was appalled last year when the topic was brought up in a ladies class I was teaching and several of the ladies said they would rather find out their child was a drug dealer than to find out that they were gay....WHAT??? This is a class of long time Christians. It is frightening how we in the church think there are degrees and levels of sin. It breaks my heart that when we sing His Grace Reaches Me...we are often singing...but not THEM!

Looking forward to some interesting conversation....I better go get my own coffee!
Oct 16, 2006 at 11:20AM | Unregistered CommenterDonna
Chiming in late but...

FWIW, some of my closest friends are gay. I'm anxious to get into this discussion.

When someone asks me about how *I* feel about my friend(s) being gay, I tend to tell them that I love them just the same. Their sexuality hasn't skewed my opinion of them. Do I agree with it? Not necessarily. But I do my best to be the supportive type of friend I've always been to them and the same type of friend that I want them to be with me.

I try to be as open and honest with them about my feelings towards and in regards to homosexuality. I love them. They are still my friends. I do, however, struggle with this subject and the relationship one has with God. As someone else mentioned (I think she said her brother) she knows someone in a committed same sex relationship who says he love God. I have friends who are in similar positions.

I'm anxious to hear the discussion on this topic and know that you and I share a lot of the same views on this as well as some very dear and close friends.

Oh and may I have hot chocolate instead of coffee? LOTS of mini marshmallows in it?!! :)

Best Regards,
Jules
Oct 16, 2006 at 12:10PM | Unregistered CommenterJules
I find it interesting that two people so far have said that they know gay people who "SAY (emphasis mine) they love god", like there is no way that could really be true, or at the very least it is suspect, but they say it. If it were anyone else that someone knew would you remark that they "say the love god" or would you just say "they love god"?
Anyway that is what jumped right out at me so far.
Oct 16, 2006 at 01:00PM | Unregistered CommenterBrian
BILL - I knew the coffee would draw you in!

BEANER - that's totally what I'm drinking right now! We were separated at birth!

LEE, that's just what they are... my thoughts. I'm looking forward to hearing others too!

AMY G - You move me. Truly. I'm glad you feel comfy here and I hope it's a good outlet for you to work through all the things that bring tears to your eyes. I'm no stranger to those tears... yours and mine!

DONNA, you're not late at all. Would we start without you? NEVER!

JULES! Yeah, woman! You have a big ol' heart! Thanks for making room for so many - including me! And I suppose I'll forgive you for wanting hot chocolate rather than coffee! I love you!

BRIAN! Hey man! I'm so glad you're here! We really need your perspective. You've commented on one of those subtle statements that reveal our deeper beliefs (BTW, I noticed it too!) In Christianity we really struggle with "How can he/she love God and still be involved in something we consider sin that separates from Him?" For that matter... How can I say I love God and still be the sinner I am? I have absolutely no doubt that Amy G's brother and Jules' friends love God. I know them. So, thanks for pointing that out. Those subtle suggestions can really hurt... and Christians may be totally oblivious to it.
Oct 16, 2006 at 01:26PM | Unregistered CommenterAngie
Thanks for that comment Angie.
As I thought about it further after posting I realized that if there is ANY gay person that can freely and willingly say that they love god after going though what most gay people who grow up in "the church" go though, I'd say believe 'em because IMO if there is anyone in current day first world areas that are persecuted for their christian beliefs, its gay christians, and if they can hold on to their love of god though that mess, then they must really love that guy.
Oct 16, 2006 at 01:57PM | Unregistered CommenterBrian
BTW, have you seen the movie "Fish Can't Fly"?

http://www.fishcantfly.com/index.html

It could be interesting to get your perspective on it durring this discussion.
Oct 16, 2006 at 02:02PM | Unregistered CommenterBrian
It would be much easier to live in my own little world where homosexuality doesn't have any effect. I don't know anyone who is gay. I don't have any friends that have been affected by homosexuality in anyway. So, to be honest, I can't say that I'm excited about the conversation.

However, after talking with Kim this morning, spurred on by this post and especially Amy's comments, I'm reminded that "my little world" is in denial. Homosexuality HAS affected the lives of many close friends. (Funny how I can so easily forget that.)

I'm still not eagerly anticipating the conversation. I'm nervous about having toes stepped on and my own prejudices exposed. But like Proverbs 12:1 says, "He who hates correction is stupid!"

So pour me a black cup of coffee and save a seat at the table for me.
Oct 16, 2006 at 02:16PM | Unregistered CommenterTim Rush

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